happy holidays, California style:

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, best wishes for an environmentally- conscious, socially-responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. I also wish you a fiscally-successful, personally-fulfilling and medically -uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2006, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere. And without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee. By accepting these greetings you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself or himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.

Or, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!


allie said...

ack! love it!

FreeThinker said...

My lawyer advised me to "accept" your greeting.

Winter Solstice Greetings to you and yours!

Ren said...

Too funny!

And thank you for your musically-minded holiday wishes as well! Very thoughtful of you to, well, think of me. :)

m.c.s said...

Loved every word of your greeting...thanks for the mooosic. I am coming to San Fran on the 1st of Feb. clear your calendar woman!!!